It’s Okay To Feel Bad

It’s okay to feel bad sometimes. Alternating moods are part of your nature. By accepting it and making yourself stronger, the storm will soon pass.
It's okay to feel bad

Sometimes you blame yourself for feeling bad or depressed. However, you don’t realize that in some situations it’s okay to feel bad.

Have you ever wondered what lies behind certain expressions, such as “you look stupid when you cry,” “men don’t cry” or “shut up?”  These seemingly harmless sentences are actually forms of torment and reproach in disguise.

The people who say these things to you are, as it were, telling you that there is something wrong with how you feel and that you shouldn’t feel that way. You shouldn’t feel sad after experiencing loss, they say.

You shouldn’t feel angry after being cheated on. Actually? Why shouldn’t you feel that way? Recognizing all your emotions creates steps to climb to self-awareness.

Wife not feeling well

Why is it okay to feel bad?

We all go through good and bad times. It’s part of your nature. Change is part of the momentum of your life. In principle, there is nothing bad about your fluctuating moods, contrary to what certain people and cultures say.

In many cases, you can feel bad, not just because of loss or betrayal or something like that, but because of the impotence that comes from not being able to get yourself out of that state of mind. What you often do is direct all your anger on yourself. By doing this, you actually only make the wound and pain deeper and more painful.

So it’s okay to feel bad if:

  • you want to express what you feel.
  • you want to communicate something about what you feel.
  • something unpleasant happens to you.
  • something happens to someone near you.
  • you feel unmotivated.

These are just a few examples. In fact, the most important thing about emotions, when they appear in your life, is that you accept them and listen to them. You should understand them as messengers and not as bearers of bad news.

Feeling bad, beyond the suffering

When you begin to see things from this perspective and understand that feeling bad is a great opportunity to learn, the intensity of the suffering will diminish. This does not mean that you will automatically stop feeling bad. However, it does mean that you will begin to distance yourself from suffering. Remember that suffering can often be a choice.

When you assimilate this, you can make resilience one of your greatest virtues. You can overcome your discomfort, find meaning in your life and learn from every experience.

How do you deal with feeling bad

How do you deal with feeling bad?

There are several ways to deal with feeling bad. A good way is to start with a journey into the depths of your soul. Self-knowledge is a powerful tool that allows you to know how you feel and where you want to go.

Another way is to determine how you are doing on an emotional level and then to set goals for yourself, for example to be more assertive and choose your coping strategies better.

For example, if you know that you get annoyed when you make mistakes, you can start working on them. You can express your anger in a more controlled way and not let it get out of hand.

Ask for help

Another option is to ask for help from, for example, a psychologist or psychiatrist. We all need support. These professionals not only help you when you’re feeling down, but they also help you get the best out of yourself. 

Another thing you can do is participate in activities that make you a little happier. For example, exercise, paint, dance, and spend time with others closest to you.

The important thing is to find meaning in the path you chart for yourself. That way you can say goodbye to suffering. Viktor Frankl talks about this in his book Man’s Search for Meaning (Dutch version The meaning of existence: an introduction to logotherapy ), through a shocking and account of his life experience.

In short, feeling bad is fine if you use the experiences to achieve emotional acceptance. Leave room for your emotions to breathe and communicate their message to you.

It could very well be that someone hurt you or that you really suffered a significant loss. However, these things will enter your life to give you the energy you need to reflect or act. They will leave you alone after that.

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