“Forgive Me”: Magic Words That Change Relationships

Some people tend to replace the word “forgive me” or “I’m sorry” with an excuse. Such people not only display low emotional intelligence, but also neglect the intrinsic power of forgiveness to heal misunderstandings and mend relationships.

“Forgive me” is not just a phrase. It’s actually the magic ingredient for any relationship to work well. Gandhi said that forgiveness is characteristic of the strong.

This is because speaking these words out loud requires a great deal of courage, humility and character. You openly admit that you made mistakes or did something wrong.

The truth is that we are generally seriously deficient in this area. We often tend to relate the practice of forgiveness to more serious situations.

Situations where you need to speak words of forgiveness to mend wounds and make it easier to turn the page and move on. However, knowing how to ask for forgiveness is something we should practice more often in our daily lives.

I’m sorry I…

  • didn’t do what I promised
  • forced you to do something you weren’t capable of
  • rudely replied
  • didn’t call when you needed it most

These are undoubtedly some of the situations where we need to know how to use this magic word. The psychology of forgiveness tells us that this action is the cornerstone of human relationships, and so we should make better (and more) use of it.

The Power of the Words “Forgive Me”

Misunderstandings are common in our everyday social interactions. Sometimes you misunderstand information someone has told you and other times you clearly misjudge. Still other times you inadvertently neglect the people you value most.

You assume there is no problem and they will never be offended if they really value us as friends. Yet they take offense (often quite rightly), and it all ends in bad feelings and disappointment.

We could give hundreds of examples of common situations where minor disagreements arise. What’s worse is that the small problems that crop up can often pile up and grow into something bigger if not successfully resolved.

If you are careless in your relationships in this way, the trust and affection will begin to wane and may even disappear altogether.

A timely “forgive me” can save friendships, relationships, marriages, and even the relationship with our children and the respect they have for us. However, there are people who just don’t know how to use these words, and worse, there are others who would rather offer all sorts of lame excuses than say the words “I’m sorry.”

They do this because they think forgiveness is synonymous with weakness. They look down on you and would rather have an excuse to justify their failure, misbehavior and neglect.

The Psychology of Forgiveness

In psychology it is customary to talk about the need to forgive. You know very well that it is not easy at all to give forgiveness to someone who has hurt you. One aspect you may not have thought about is how hard it is for others to swallow their pride and ask for forgiveness.

It’s a difficult step to take because you need to feel empathy, recognize the harm you’ve done, have the courage to take the step, and most importantly, have the right social skills to do it the right way.

You should also keep in mind that “I’m sorry” doesn’t help much if the person doesn’t change their attitude. Let’s take a look at an example.

A father apologizes to his son for not keeping a promise. The child may accept his father’s apology. However, if those promises are repeatedly broken, the request for forgiveness loses its meaning.

It then becomes hot air, no more than empty words. So, in addition to courage and responsibility, you must also take action to restore what you have done.

What can we do with people who never ask for forgiveness?

You may have encountered people who are unable to say “I’m sorry” or “forgive me.” We keep hoping that one day they will swallow their pride, but they seem to get even more arrogant and even try to make us believe that it’s all our fault or that what happened isn’t really that important.

So, what can we do when faced with such a situation? The first thing we need to do is try to understand why these people act this way. The fact is that those who stubbornly refuse to ask for forgiveness are trying to protect their self-esteem.

They conflict with the image they are trying to project, assuming that the act of asking for forgiveness is synonymous with weakness and fallibility. They think it is a way to lose the trust of others and of themselves.


As you can see, it is not easy to live with someone who thinks that acknowledging their mistakes is an acknowledgment of weakness. If this continues, and their lack of emotional intelligence is not resolved, you will live in a state of constant frustration and suffering. Living with someone who replaces an “I’m sorry” with an excuse is not a healthy way to live.

On the other hand, we cannot force someone to ask for forgiveness. It is something that has to come from their heart and a desire to deal with the damage that has been done.

Knowing how to ask for forgiveness is something that must be learned from an early age. There are few sentences that are so relevant in our daily lives.

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